Saturday Football Update

by

Some good rivalry games this weekend and the end of the season for some.

11 – The Game, with Michigan at tOSU. This totally cracks me up and I want tOSU to win. Of course I hate both teams and wish they could bof lose, but the irony on this game is delicious. tOSU last year when the NCAA came calling for the violations could have taken the one game bowl ban LAST YEAR, when they were in a crap bowl, but no. So, now they have a chance to run the table and they now have to take their bowl game ban THIS YEAR, when they would have been a shoo in for the national title game. Love it! Go Buckeyes! You dumb fucks!

11 – Illinois at Northwestern – God damn I am glad the season ends here today against our hated in state rival Northwestern. Our new coach (wisely, haha) started picking a fight with Northwestern, trying to fuel up the rivalry. Instead, Northwestern is typically good and we haven’t won a Big Ten game in well over a year now. They are going to kick our ass and take the Land of Lincoln trophy away from us for the forseeable future.

2 – Oregon at Oregon State in the Civil War – The Ducks still have an outside shot at the NC game, but they need to take care of business in Corvallis if that is going to happen. On the dumb Pac 12 Network, so nobody gets to watch.

2.30 – Auburn vs. Alabama – Iron Bowl, baby! Bama should cruise in this one, and TD’s Whargles look to be on probation very soon as the NCAA investigators are swarming the Auburn campus for a bazillion violations. Lets just vacate that Cam Newton title now rather than stringing it out.

2.30 – Florida at Florida State – always an entertaining rivalry, and one with big national implications

2.30 – Olkaholo State at Oklahomo – Bedlam!

2.30 – Tulane at Houston – It looks like Tulane will end yet another dismal year with the same record as the Illini at 2-10 after they lose at Houston today.

6 – Mizzou at Tejas A and M – what a great year for the Aggies. That new coach Sumlin is doing a great job with Mike Sherman’s kids.

7 – ND at USuC – I am OK with whoever wins in this one. If the Trojanicus Maximus pull it off, it crushes ND’s plans of a NC appearance. If ND wins, evir pran!!!! They will hopefully get housed in the NC game by (Alabama, Georgia or Florida). And then we can licky the sweet tears of all the ND fans.

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172 Responses to “Saturday Football Update”

  1. Carl from Chicago Says:

    Yes the Illini are likely going to get whooped up on by Northwestern but I am hoping for the best.

    It is hilarious that OSU could have been in the national championship game but they botched it all by doing their sanctions wrong. Love the Auburn “all in” with Cam Newton plan I guess Dan you could start a business consulting with the NCAA on how best to plan for taking your violations in stride.

    I read that if it was Notre Dame vs Bama then the line would be Bama by 10. Interesting to see if all the Notre Dame action would move that line but I leave that sort of analysis to Dan.

  2. Carl from Chicago Says:

    Damn I was trying to embed a soundgarden video from Letterman how the hell do I do that?

  3. dfm Says:

    Nice – you should just be able to put the link here and it automatically embeds. God I hope osu wins so they can be undefeated with no bowl and it is their own dammed fault. I think I would have to pile in on bama with only ten point spread that is going to be woodshed time.

  4. johnnyj Says:

    …Happy Gameday Gents…

    …Last night, I had this crazy nightmare that the DAWGS choked in overtime against the lowly Coooooogs…Oh, wait, nevermind…

  5. dfm Says:

    Bated? Nice autocorrect on the kindle.

  6. dfm Says:

    Wow! Two consecutive first downs for Illinois!

  7. dfm Says:

    Holy crap this actually looks like a drive!

  8. Carl from Chicago Says:

    Bated? Did you ever see the movie Idiocracy?

  9. dfm Says:

    Fuck yea td!!!

  10. dfm Says:

    Illegal numbering! That is the first time I have ever seen that call in my 38 years of watching football. But 7-0 we will take it.

  11. johnnyj Says:

    OF COURSE the ‘civil war’ is on the pac-12 network so nobody can watch it…FML…

  12. dfm Says:

    Special teams as always delivering for the Illinois opponent. Dammit.

  13. dfm Says:

    Pick hell yea!

  14. johnnyj Says:

    ‘Shithouse’ is awesome!

  15. dfm Says:

    And a pick right back. Fuck you shithouse.

  16. dfm Says:

    We sick. Yep.

  17. johnnyj Says:

    Hot DAMN Illineeise!

  18. dfm Says:

    Riley motherfuckin o toole!!!!

  19. TD Says:

    Here I sit, with my sixer of Shiner and a turkey leg, watching tOSU and those other guys.
    I can’t help but think that anything over 10 years in Ohio imbeds an inherent dislike for Meesh-again

  20. Sk8 Says:

    Damn, this might be the only time the whole gang is here this year (jj, TD, Sk8, Hotcarl, DFM). We just need Astro!

    Course it’s 9pm here local time.

  21. dfm Says:

    Bleh

  22. TD Says:

    the Mish QB gets the ball shoved into his facemask… whoooo

  23. johnnyj Says:

    “I’m not sure why they call it hamburger helper, I think the stuff does just fine all by itself! I like tuna helper myself, how about you clark?”

  24. TD Says:

    tOSU back on top.

  25. johnnyj Says:

    Mish-again.

  26. dfm Says:

    Td northwestern. What a joke season.

  27. johnnyj Says:

    …Good thing we all picked Rutgers, Pitt is making them look silly…

  28. TD Says:

    … it’s about that powder thing… ouch!

  29. johnnyj Says:

    DAMN IT Virginia Tech! I’m never picking them again…

  30. johnnyj Says:

    Oh nice, the ‘Bayou classic’ is on, soooo excited (Not)…Didn’t you go to that by accident once, sk8?

    “…You boys mind if we dance with your dates?”

  31. TD Says:

    I’m lookin’ at the sanctions in the Big Ten… I think the NCAA should just go ahead and sanction everyone, cause I’m sure that if they looked they could find something to sanction on every team… except maybe Tulane. that would then make Tulane the national champ!

  32. johnnyj Says:

    Split pool for TTech/Baylor…Lets go Bears!

  33. dfm Says:

    Michigans offense has zip this half.

  34. johnnyj Says:

    Red Raiders off to a good start, 14-0…

  35. Carl from Chicago Says:

    Just got back from lunch and saw that the Illini got pasted and gave up 50 points to boot. Ouch.

    Damn it is cold outside I need to acclimate for the Bears tomorrow. Hope they put up a better game then they did on Monday night.

    Thankfully I was so jet lagged getting back from Asia that I taped that game vs. 49ers and went to bed at 7pm but seeing how terrible it was I never even watched it.

  36. dfm Says:

    Pick tosu!

  37. johnnyj Says:

    Touchdown Baylor! Finally…

  38. TD Says:

    Mish-again goes down to defeat once again!
    (unless the Bucks hand them the ball in the last 30 seconds or so)

  39. dfm Says:

    Congrats to Ohio state on the perfect season and more importantly for taking the bowl ban last year instead of this year. Hahahaha and fuck you!

  40. dfm Says:

    Iron bowl baby!

  41. johnnyj Says:

    Ahhh, and VT hits the FG as time expires, 17-14…I don’t believe it!

  42. johnnyj Says:

    Awwww shiiit, and a split pool for the Florida game…

  43. TD Says:

    Good games in late afternoon… lotsa channel surfing going on!

  44. astro Says:

    Found the Tulane game on DTV ch634. Already down by 7.

  45. Sk8 Says:

    Oregon up 13-7.

    (axle rose voice) We don’t need yo civil war-u-wahhhh, It feeds the rich and kills the paw-u-waaaaah!

  46. astro Says:

    Woohoo! TD Tulane. No shutout today!

  47. dfm Says:

    Damn bama taking auburn to the woodshed early.

  48. dfm Says:

    Florida taking care of bizness so far 13-0, five mins left in the second.

  49. astro Says:

    And that should do it for Auburn…

  50. Sk8 Says:

    20-17 now, OSU scores first in the second half.

  51. johnnyj Says:

    …We have us a real Tejas shootout, c’mon Baylor!

  52. TD Says:

    Shoot! Baylor might could pull this one out!

  53. dfm Says:

    Gaytors losing now.

  54. johnnyj Says:

    10 says he shanks it!

  55. johnnyj Says:

    …And Penn State just took the lead over Bucky…Go for 2!!!

  56. johnnyj Says:

    Baylor Wins Baylor wins!

  57. TD Says:

    whoooop Baylor!
    this town is pretty evenly divided between Tech and Baylor… I have to walk a rather thin line when talking football.

  58. johnnyj Says:

    Stanford and fUCLA time! Stanford better not blow this one and give the pac-12 title game to the stupid DUCKS!

  59. TD Says:

    OU an OSU tied up (Okies that is)… I need about another 3 or 4 tv screens to keep up with all these nail-biters.

  60. johnnyj Says:

    hahhhaaaa, Pick Nittany! Suck it Bucky…

  61. johnnyj Says:

    Ah crap, Florida State with the backup qb ‘Clint Tricket’ in now. Sounds like a venereal disease…

  62. TD Says:

    Looks like another OT with Nittany’s and Badgers.

  63. johnnyj Says:

    DAMN YOU Bucky. Every friggin time…

  64. johnnyj Says:

    Good grief, Nittany’s trying really really hard to piss this away…

  65. johnnyj Says:

    Blah ha SHAAAAANK! Suck it BUCKY!!!!

  66. TD Says:

    a flub for the badgers…. Lions win!!!!!

  67. TD Says:

    And now…..
    Capping off a stellar year under a new coach…
    I present to you…..

    Yourrrrrrrrr Fighting Texas Aggies!

    Yeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, Gig ‘Em Aggies!

  68. TD Says:

    First of many! (smooch)

  69. TD Says:

    Sheesh! another OT with the Sooners and Cowboys!

  70. TD Says:

    Second of many!

  71. johnnyj Says:

    Aggies looking good… (smoooch)

  72. TD Says:

    Uh Oh.

  73. TD Says:

    Manziel gets a twisted knee, but the team retaliates with the third of many. Gig ‘Em.

  74. johnnyj Says:

    The Cardinal starting to put the hurt on fUCLA 21-7…

  75. TD Says:

    Gee, JJ. with our KFIL gang, we’ve got the West Coast covered, the upper midwest covered, Texas covered, the deep south covered… we need someone who gives a shit about the east coast teams..

  76. johnnyj Says:

    Ok, so I guess that the KFIL consensus is that we’re all cheering for Notre Dame in order for our ‘evir pran’ to take place, correct?

    …It’s hard for me cheer for either one of these teams, hate em.

  77. TD Says:

    Manziel is back in the game, and the Ags score with the 4th of many… whoop!

  78. johnnyj Says:

    And I just realized that this Stanford/fUCLA game will likely be played again next week for the pac-12 title. Yawn…

  79. johnnyj Says:

    3-way tie so far in the pool today but the Rook is about to go down…And Sk8, WTF happened? Did your son do your picks this week?

  80. johnnyj Says:

    …I gotta do it, gents. Lane fuckin Kiffin:

  81. astro Says:

    Haha Johnny Football is awesome.

  82. TD Says:

    He scrambles; he passes… 5th of many! Gig ‘Em and… (smooch)

  83. TD Says:

    Its Awwwwwwsome! 6th of many…

  84. astro Says:

    Haha he had like 30 seconds to throw that ball. Johnny Heisman!

  85. TD Says:

    Awwwww. Big MO slithers in for a score… there goes a shutout.

  86. dfm Says:

    I am with you guys – fuck nd always. But good to have evir pran to fall back on. Gonna watch the rest of this one horizontally.

  87. dfm Says:

    Lane motherfuckin muffin. Damn I love that video.

  88. TD Says:

    I see the Troj’s are hangin’ in there.

  89. astro Says:

    Johnny Heisman with a rushing TD

  90. TD Says:

    7th of many!
    Gig ‘Em Aggies! (smooch)

  91. TD Says:

    7 1/2 of many…
    this is the first drive that didn’t end with a TD.

  92. TD Says:

    Ags defense musta been reading comic books or somethin’. MO’s receiver was WIDE open.

  93. TD Says:

    Johnny’s getting a little tired from throwing all those TD passes…. he just threw his first interception.

  94. TD Says:

    8 of many… (smooch)

  95. TD Says:

    Awesome season for the Aggies! you could see the strength of the team build as the season progressed.
    Ag’s take Mizzou 59-29.

  96. Sk8 Says:

    ND vs U$C a pretty good game. 22-13 ND up, 5:50 left in the 4th.

  97. dfm Says:

    Looking forward to watching bama destroy nd.

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